We thought: it may not always be a choice

I have started baby wearing.

In my research the information and articles I found were often accompanied with images of indigenous men and women carrying their babies. It was as though being associated with these people makes our decision more real, more natural and more in tune with our children.  A choice that is better than all other options because it’s what they chose.


They want us to see a mother so connected with the natural order of things that she instinctively carries her baby with no other thought.  They want us to see a deep and abiding maternal bond that can only achieved by constant closeness of a mother with her child.  They want us to see love, contentment and ease.

What I see is hard work.  What I see is babies carrying babies.  I see long heavy days and tired bodies.  What I don’t see is choice.

I love carrying Miss T for lots of reasons, but if I didn’t have a choice I wonder how appealing it would be.  And if it would feel as ‘glamorous’ and natural as the images make it out to be.


3 thoughts on “We thought: it may not always be a choice

  1. Interesting observations. Choice is such a big thing in everything we do. God allows us absolute choice to do what we want, when we want and how we want. The only thing we sometimes forget to factor in is that for every choice we make there is a consequence that God does not allow us to avoid. God is so great that he tells us the choice is ours, the consequences are ours and the responsibility is ours as well. It can be a simple thing of, as you say baby wearing or in the much bigger decisions in life. Choice is actually a very fascinating subject.

  2. I’d love to carry Tiddler round with me but he weighs 19lb now and is 6-months old so wants to go exploring everywhere. I borrowed a sling from a friend but only used it for 3-months and even then found it tricky to get stuff done – bending down to put laundry into the machine, washing the dishes and trying to change Toddler’s nappies became impossible so I had to put him in his chair or on the playmat instead. I guess we have different lifestyles in the western world.

    • You make a good point about everyone having different lifestyles. I think that’s why modeling our own behavior on the indigenous tribal communities, in many ways, just doesn’t work.

      It’s something we all learn very quickly as mothers isn’t it? What works for one doesn’t always work for another and doesn’t make it any less wrong or right !!

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